After sex to-do list, keep it handy!
After sex activities, what are they? The sex you had with your partner was amazing, like the kind that blows your mind, gives you the biggest orgasm of your life, and makes you scream — that kind of amazing. Your legs are weak, and you’re covered in sweat, fluids, and who-knows-what. You’re not sure if you want to go for round two or if you need to sleep for a few days to recover. But you’re definitely going to have sore muscles tomorrow, and you’ll smile every time you feel them.
Before you roll over and go to sleep after sex like that or even the more mundane sex you usually have, there are a few things you should do once you’re done. If you do, your body, mind, and relationship will be healthier for it. You’re forgiven if you don’t do this after the kind of sex that makes you pass out from exhaustion. But after most sexual encounters, do these things to take care of yourself and your relationship.
1. Go to the Bathroom
If your sex involves vaginal penetration, pee as soon as you can after sex. This will help flush out any potential bacteria or toxins from your urinary tract. It’s a good habit to get into regardless of what sex positions you enjoyed together. You don’t have to jump up the moment you’re done having sex to go pee, but using the bathroom before and after sex can help reduce your chance of a urinary tract infection (UTI).
While you’re in there, go ahead and wash your vagina and vulva, especially if sex got a bit messy. Use a gentle, unscented soap and warm water. Wipe front to back to prevent getting any bacteria where it doesn’t belong. This can also help you prevent UTIs and other infections, too. If you’d prefer, take a quick shower — invite your partner in, too. Even if you didn’t have penetrative sex, a shower is great to get lube, sweat, and other fluids off your skin.
2. Drink Plenty of Water
Whether you have squirting orgasms or you get sweaty during sex, drinking water afterwards is always a good idea. This replenishes your fluids and helps keep you from getting dehydrated. Drink it before to help keep you focused, alert, and full of energy. After sex, water can cool you off and help you feel refreshed. If you’ve ever had a really dry mouth or a funny taste in your mouth after sex, that’s your body telling you it needs some water. And if the aftertaste of oral sex isn’t your favorite flavor, water will help with that, too.
3. Eat a Snack
Even mediocre sex burns a few calories, so if you’re having mind-blowing, amazing, heart-pumping sex, you’re using a ton of energy in the process. Once you’re done, grab a snack. People who would rather have a sandwich instead of taking a nap or cuddling are onto something.
Depending on the level of activity and length of your sexy fun, you may need to refuel, especially if you’re considering a second round later. Ideally, you’ll want to eat healthy probiotic-rich foods like yogurt, tofu, kimchi, and fermented foods to replenish the good bacteria in your body. But grabbing a sandwich, pizza, or even a couple of eggs with cheese will get rid of any hunger pangs and help you keep going.
4. Put on Something Comfortable
If you’d rather stay naked after sex, go for it! But if you absolutely must get dressed, make sure you wear something comfortable. Choose cotton underwear as your vagina is likely still damp — or even soaking wet. You need something breathable but also absorbent to wear. You also don’t want anything that could irritate your vulva. Let your body breathe and get dry. Don’t want to wear underwear? We don’t blame you. Go for loose-fitting pajamas instead. The point is not to put on anything too tight. You need to let your body breathe. And if you’re thinking of starting again for a second round of steamy sex, you want clothes that come off easily.
5. Clean Up Any Mess
Good sex can be messy. Great sex usually is. Now that you’re fed, watered, and cleaned up, it’s time to clean up the bed or wherever you just fucked. Throw away your used condoms and wrappers — but don’t flush them down the toilet. Pick up any tissues, wet wipes, or towels you used to wipe away semen or other fluids.
Depending on how wet things got, you might want to change the sheets or get a clean blanket for the bed. Unless you love falling asleep in a bed that smells like sex and sweat (no judgment here if you do!), take a few minutes to clean up after yourselves so you can get it all dirty again or take a nap in a nice, clean space.
6. Clean Your Sex Toys
Did you use your favorite sex toys or try something new this time? Don’t let them sit around and get dry and crusty now that you’re done. Keeping your sex toys clean means they’ll last longer and, more importantly, be ready to use when you want to play again. Most toys only need a bit of warm water and soap to get clean, but always read the manufacturer’s instructions. If you shared your toys with a partner and body fluids were swapped, you’ll want to sterilize them as best as you can.
Some sex toys can be tossed in the dishwasher or put in boiling water — glass, metal, even some silicone — as long as it doesn’t have a battery, cord, or other power source. In other cases, you might want to use a sex toy cleaner. If you’re using a toy made of something like TPR/TPE, jelly, or rubber, it’s impossible to sterilize, so clean it as best as you can and use a condom over it if you plan to share with a partner in the future.
7. Cuddle Up Together
First you had great sex, and then you cleaned up, had a snack, and put your room/space back together. You might be feeling tired now. This is a great time to cuddle up with your partner, but don’t just fall straight to sleep. Snuggling up together is a great way to continue bonding and feel close to each other, even without sex. Oxytocin, known as the “love hormone,” is released during this time and it can help you feel a deeper connection to your partner.
Cuddling gives you a chance to connect physically and emotionally. You might kiss and hug, which doesn’t have to lead to more sex, unless you want it to. Talk to each other, share your feelings, and enjoy this peaceful moment together — whether you drift off to sleep or not.
8. Communication and Connect
Take the time after sex, while you’re cuddling or later, to talk to each other. Say nice things and share feedback on what you enjoyed. This can be a good time to talk about what didn’t work, either, as long as you can keep it lighthearted. If you need to have a more serious conversation about what just happened, you might want to make sure you’re both completely awake and alert.
Feel free to throw some fun ideas for what you can do next time you have sex, even if “next time” is in the next hour. Joke and laugh together, about sex, the funny noises you each made, or what went right or wrong. This is a good chance to speak openly and make sure everyone’s sexual needs are being met. But you don’t have to talk about the sex you just had. Discuss whatever is on your mind. The post-sex bliss is a wonderful moment to reconnect in a new way besides the physical.
Sometimes sex wears you out so much that all you can do is collapse in a heap on top of your partner and start snoring. If you fall asleep right after sex every once in a while, it’s no big deal. In fact, it’s a sign you both did something amazing. But most of the time, it’s best to stick to a post-sex routine. It’ll help you get your energy back and maybe even be ready for a second wave of sexy fun later.
Keep yourself and your relationship healthy by doing just a few simple things after you have sex (most of the time). Taking care of yourself means you’ll be ready for whatever you and your partner want to do next — whether that’s more fucking or some time together doing other things. This routine won’t be better than sex, but it might be something you look forward to almost as much.
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