Sex is a natural and amazing part of the human experience, and just like most things in life, it can be common to fall into a sexual routine with your partner regardless of the relationship. However, once the routine is no longer satisfying to either of you, then you might have found yourself in a sexual rut.
If you’re looking to shake things up in the shack but aren’t sure how to refresh your sex life, then don’t fret! Here are some easy ways to break free from your routine and regain the fun between the sheets!
Communicate With Your Partner
Now, if you and your partner are stuck in a sexual rut, then the last thing you want to do is talk; however, communicating can play a major role in helping you break out of your routine. Sharing can bring you closer to your partner and make it easier for you to address any needs or fantasies you may have. If you’re nervous about how to approach the subject, then start by focusing on the positives. You want to find a balance between honesty and creating a nonjudgmental space between you and your partner. Introduce the subject by discussing what aspects of your sex life you love and how you think incorporating and experimenting more can be beneficial.
Communicating should never end with you or your partner feeling bad about themselves, so take responsibility for your pleasure. Be clear and explain why you need to shake things up, and remember to listen and ask questions when it’s your partner’s turn to talk. This will give you a better insight into what they need and how to make sure you both are feeling fulfilled in your sex life.
Overcome Your Insecurities
There can be various reasons why it’s so hard for you and your partner to break free from your sexual routine, and insecurities can play a big part in it. If you struggle with body insecurities, it can be hard to find the confidence to feel sexy and put yourself out there when you don’t feel good about yourself. However, if you’re going to get over your insecurities then you have to be uncomfortable first. If there are positions you didn’t want to do because of body insecurities, try them. Try having sex with the lights on, at first you will be self-conscious but over time, you will realize that every human body is a sexy body, and your partner isn’t thinking about your insecurities.
If your insecurities stem from having sexual dysfunctions, like vaginal dryness or erectile dysfunction, then don’t blame yourself. Sexual dysfunctions are caused by a multitude of reasons, sometimes triggered by health issues from poor diet to lack of exercise. Luckily, sexual dysfunctions are often treatable. If you’re a man struggling with erectile dysfunction, then talk to your primary care doctor about options such as sildenafil to help improve erections. For women, oftentimes birth control methods can cause vaginal dryness. So if you’re struggling, consider purchasing a vaginal moisturizer to help replenish your vagina, and help you feel more confident in your body. Sex isn’t airbrushed and perfect like you see on TV or in porn, it can be awkward and silly at times, so embrace that.
Try Something New
It’s easy to get stuck in a sexual routine when you are having sex at the same time, in the same places, and doing the same positions. Sure, it’s comfortable and works, but if you’re feeling bored, it might be time to change things up. Sex doesn’t have to be confined to the bedroom, so don’t be afraid to experiment with the location. Although it might be convenient to stick to a safe place, experimenting with different locations adds the element of excitement that can make you feel empowered and sexy. Try having sex on your couch or stairs as these are places you still feel comfortable but add some freshness. If you really want to take it up a notch then drive your car to your favorite location or a not-so-busy road and have at it in the back seat.
Challenging yourself in small ways, whether that be having sex in your backyard or going to another room in your house, makes it easier to take initiative. If you and your partner only have sex before bed, then try to be more spontaneous in your approach. Sometimes making a small change, like time, can help break your routine and inspire your partner to do the same.
Introduce Sex Toys
Sex toys are a great tool to explore your body and experiment with yourself—with or without your partner. Although it might seem intimidating, sex toys can increase satisfaction levels and have a positive impact on your mental health when used. Introducing sex toys can also create a dialogue between you and your partner on what is pleasurable for both parties. If you’re nervous about bringing a sex toy into the bedroom, then purchase one for yourself first. You can experiment with yourself without the added pressure and find out what gets you going.
If you want to introduce a toy that will help increase foreplay between you and your partner consider one of these Vibease's remote control vibrators, discreet sex toys that work for couples looking to spice up their long-distance relationship or for couples in close proximity that want to build anticipation. You can even synchronize the vibration with your favorite steamy erotic audiobook. Connected through the Vibease App, these vibrators will have you wanting more from your partner. Check out some of the plays you can do.
Remember, don’t put too much pressure on yourself to have it all figured out. Sex can seem complicated but it should be a fun experience for you and your partner, and everyone needs a refresher from time to time. Regardless of where you are on your sexual journey, have fun and be safe!